What Does it Mean to be a Midwife?

I wrote this when I was in School and I thought I would share with you today:

What does it mean to be a Midwife?  In order to answer this seemingly benign question, you first have to answer the question, What is a Midwife?  Webster’s dictionary defines a Midwife as: a person who assists women in childbirth.  Cleaveland Clinic says “A midwife is a healthcare provider who is trained to provide obstetric and gynecological services, including primary care, prenatal and obstetric care, and routine gynecological care like annual exams and contraception.”.  Mayes Midwifery says Midwifery is “a truly ancient calling”.  Elizabeth Davis in her book Heart and Hands says of Midwives, “Above all else, midwives advocate informed choice. They vigorously defend a mother’s right to choose place and manner of giving birth, just as she fights for her own right to practice artfully and in any setting.” 

So what is she?  A healthcare provider, an assistant to women, a special called individual, a defender of rights.  I say she is all this and oh so much more!  She stands in the brink between life and death. She is skilled in all things regarding birth, but the best births are the ones where she didn’t “do” anything.  She sat there and purposefully chose to sit on her hands and just be.  She defends a woman’s right to give birth where she chooses and will stand on the battlefield for this Mom, this family.  She will let the Dr’s cuss and spew at her, so that the mother gets her requests granted and the respect she deserves.  She will sit with a mother on the bathroom floor, with blood pouring out, all too soon.  She weeps in sorrow and she rejoices in new life. This is being “with woman”.  In the ups and downs, in the mundane and the extraordinary.

A Midwife is there to guide a woman as she not only births a new life, but becomes a new one herself! A Mother.  She advocates and guides mothers to make smart, thoughtful, researched and innate choices for themselves and the little one she carries.  She advocates for women while they are figuring out what they believe and who they really are, thus starting them off on their journey as Mother’s with a strength they didn’t know they possessed.  She is like a light shining on paths women never even knew were possible.  Paths they didn’t even realize they wanted to follow.  She is the silent support they’ve always needed, but never knew was possible.  She holds the space for whatever needs to be.

She is all these things because she has been there herself.  She needed the support, she needed the strength, she found who she was and she was called to give permission to other mothers herself.  A calling she could not refuse, as it was part of her.  Who she was created to be.  I’m reminded of my favorite quote from Marianne Williamson, 

As Marianne Williamson said:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

  This is what it means to be a Midwife, being who you were created to be by God and giving other women permission to do the same.  Liberating themselves, finding her voice, her strength and shining brightly. A light that only comes from within her.

Citations:

Cleveland Clinic Medical. (n.d.). What is a midwife? when to see one & what to expect. Cleveland Clinic. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/22648-midwife

Davis, E., & Harrison, L. (2019). In Heart & hands: A midwife’s guide to pregnancy and birth (p. 7). essay, Ten Speed Press.

Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary (10th ed.). (1999). Merriam-Webster Incorporated.

Williamson, M. (2015). A return to love: Reflections on the principles of a course in miracles. Thorsons Classics.